Madame Coquille DeMer
Ancient, elegant, terrifying in the way a calm ocean is terrifying. Never shown clearly.
The Lore ยท Canon, Unfortunately
Clam Slammers was not founded. It was discovered.
The art of clam slamming dates back roughly 380 million years, when one prehistoric bivalve struck a rock, blamed the rock, then formalized the practice into a private club.
Blake SHELLdon
Former country almost-star. Enthusiastic. Wrong. Signs everything Stay Slammin'. - B.S.
Sandy Bivalve
The only competent person in a 380-million-year-old madhouse. Every incident exists in triplicate.
Pearl Jamison
Speaks in motivational posters. Always right, usually three to five business days later.
Clamuel L. Jackson
Head of Slam Operations. Reviews impact authenticity frame by frame.
Greg
A regular clam. Verified. Employee of the Month, consecutive, all months. Greg remains.
Gary
The fallen star. Camp Gary maintains the brine was ambient. The file is thick.
The Shell Council
Never seen. Issues decrees. Disapproves of almost everything and perhaps fears Greg.